No Light
by Crossroad Avarice
Summary: And she watched as her Master destroyed everything he'd fought to protect. "Tell me what you want me to say." [Darth Vader/Ahsoka; though not quite in the way you'd think.]
1. Chapter 1

**Rila:** I live! :D So this was _supposed_ to be a one-shot split between Ahsoka's POV and Padme's POV on Anakin and his becoming Darth Vader (because Florence + The Machine's song _No Light_ is so flipping addictive) but it was all, 'No! I want to be a full fic!' and decided to run away with my brain even though I've got plenty of other fics on here to keep me occupied, not to mention the Fives booklet I've been meaning to get up here _it should be here within the week I promise_ and what not...eh, oh well...enjoy! :D Also, never fear - though this will focus primarly on Darth Vader and Ahsoka, Rex will be in here - after all, I don't seem to be able to write anything that doesn't have Ahsoka and Rex together at some point. XD Beta-ed by the absolutely amazing _Impoeia! :D_

Disclaimer: _I got to go Easter Egg hunting today. Whoever said you can get too old to do so lied! Even though...more or less, I'm still a kid - I'm still a teenager! XD Mind you, one who's legally capable of making her own decisions, but...technicalities!_

Word Count: 745

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_Prologue_

The room is not a cell — he's told her several times that she's free to leave the room — but she doesn't move from her place on the bed, legs bent and head bowed. Fingers on her knees, tips pressing against her skin. Eyes closed, she inhales and then exhales.

Meditation is something that had never been easy before, but comes to her now without much struggling; a search for tranquility that she cannot find where she is now. She wishes that she could talk to someone outside of this forsaken place, but her comlink had been one of the first things to go when she arrived.

Originally it had been to keep her from revealing her location and thus putting a crimp in _his_ plans — but even with her newfound freedom, it still hasn't been returned to her. Her eyes open when the door does, a shadow falling over the sudden display of light behind the arrival. Breathing, a wheezing rhythm, fills the air for several moments before a distorted voice tells her,

"Time for dinner. Will you join me?"

The first few times there'd been a stormtrooper to retrieve her, only to be sent back alone with her refusal to eat. And then she had been dragged away from her room, forced to join him and his soldiers as though there were nothing wrong with it. His tone is light, as if it's a normal question, and this is a normal setting. He's even come to retrieve her himself, as if to placate her and make her bend to his will.

She doesn't have any intention of doing so.

She doesn't answer right away, vivid blue eyes locked onto the black mask that hides the shriveled husk of what used to be someone she knew — what used to be a man who she had _loved_. Not in a romantic sense, but still someone close to her heart. He's gone now, but perhaps not completely — because as the silence stretches on, her staring and him simply breathing — he finally breaks the silence.

The word that he says is so simple, used by so many — and yet, for a tiny moment, either by some sort of delusion of her own creation or simply to make her do as he asks, he sounds like the man he used to be. It sounds so odd, however, coming from the man that he is now. "Please."

She uncurls her legs, stretching her muscles before she stands and approaches. She stops before him, head tilted back. Even now, with her full lekku that reach to her hips and beyond and her montrals, grown to curve elegantly above her head, she still has to tilt her head back to look at him. She simply stares for a handful of moments more, and then finally speaks. "Tell me what you want me to say."

Because she holds no delusions that she is simply here because she'd be killed otherwise; or that he enjoys her company — he wants something from her, and she already knows that she won't say or do anything even before he speaks.

"Say you forgive me."


	2. Chapter 2

**Rila:** Here I am with the second chapter — which is technically the first chapter! :D This is set before Order 66 at the moment - there's another chapter or two before the Order goes down, and then all Hell breaks loose. Beta-ed by the wonderful _Impoeia! _

Disclaimer: _'The Plague' from the Prince of Egypt soundtrack fits Order 66 scarily well. At least to me it does...'Once I called you brother/_

Word Count: 1,258

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_Scene One_ — _Corulag, Corolus System._

Everything is chaos. Beautiful and ugly at the same time, a mixture that weighs on the cusp between brutality and elegance as she spins her way through the lines of metal bodies, swinging both humming blades through the enemy with the shriek of the dusty brown metal the droids were made of. The smell of hot metal and acrid blaster smoke invades her nostrils, a scent that she is far more familiar with than softer scents. Scents like the sparse clumps of grass crushed beneath dozens of clone and droid feet alike as the battle continues, noise rising to a crescendo in her ears.

And just below that she can hear the rhythmic thumping of her own heart, pounding wildly in only the way that battle can do; a heady dose of adrenaline that keeps her going even as her muscles scream for a reprieve. She doesn't know how long this battle has persisted, but she knows far too well that it won't carry on for much longer, either by way of dwindling numbers on her side or the sheer size of the enemy's. Either way, this battle is going to end soon, and it doesn't look like it will do so in her favor.

The realization has Ahsoka grinding her sharp teeth together, a burst of anger throwing her into the fray with a burst of renewed energy. It's only as she's dancing over the wedge-shaped heads of droids that she realizes that her anger is unbecoming of a Jedi, but she can't check her reaction at the moment as she descends, twin blades swinging in blurs of bright green and yellow.

The sound of her lightsabers is a familiar sound, one joined by a steadier, stronger thrumming that doesn't belong to her dual blades and she turns, sensing the familiar presence even before she sees him entering the fray. A smile spreads across her lips before she can stop it, a subconscious reaction of relief in seeing him. Back-up has arrived, and the battle swiftly changes tides as his bright blue blade joins her whirling dance of green and yellow, a brief glance shared between them in a split second where she passes him.

_Good job,_ the emotion behind his dark blue eyes says, then darkens and vanishes all together as his attention slides to the bruises and shallow cuts that line her arms. Not enough to stop her, but enough to twinge and remind her of their existence when her muscles bunch in a certain way. A shake of her head dismisses their severity, though her Master hardly looks convinced — but he cannot blame her for playing it off, not when he's done the same so many times. And then the contact is broken as she slides past, wiping out another row of B1's.

The battle ends soon and with their victory, which is celebrated with a weary, ragged chorus of cheers from the remaining men who aren't being piled into a LAAT/i for evac to the waiting flagship hovering in the atmosphere. Despite the victory, Ahsoka knows that they have lost many men, too many for her to feel any real euphoria in the triumph that they've just snatched from the Separatists. The loss is softened when she spots Rex helping one of his men to the LAAT/i, a silent reassurance that he hasn't fallen in the battle. It's unbecoming of her to care so much for him, just as the anger she'd felt before is unacceptable, but she can't help it.

"Good job, Snips." Anakin's voice brings Ahsoka out of her thoughts and she straightens up before turning towards him, offering a weary smile in return. A smile that fades, however, when he follows his praise up with a stern addition of, "You should get those looked at."

Accompanied by a wave to her battle battered limbs, Ahsoka can't quite stop the grimace that pulls at her lips. "I'm fine," she tells him, but her words don't seem to placate him as Anakin frowns, sharp blue eyes narrowing in warning.

"Rex," he calls, waving for the clone who turns and approaches, "Make sure Ahsoka makes it onto that LAAT/i and gets herself checked into the medical bay."

"Master!" she snaps out of both anger and embarassment for being treated like a child. Her gaze challenges his before she crosses her arms across her chest and stalks towards the LAAT/i, Rex in tow. "They're just scratches," she tells him as he falls into step beside her, "Master's freaking out about nothing."

"He worries about you, kid." Ever the calmer, cooler voice of reason, Rex diffuses her anger without even trying and Ahsoka sighs, shoulders slumping as she unlocks her arms and allows them to swing down by her sides. Even though she's too proud to admit it to her Master's face — especially not with the admittedly childish stunt she's just pulled by walking away in a huff —, the battle's taken quite a lot out of her, and she finds herself longing for her bed on the _Resolute._

"Doesn't mean he has to treat me like a child."

"You _are_ a kid, kid." Rex's voice is tinted with amusement now, and Ahsoka's lips twitch as she lifts an arm and punches Rex's armored bicep with her fist, knuckles knocking the plastoid cover as she retorts,

"Like you're one to talk."

Rex says nothing in response, simply shaking his head as they approach the LAAT/i. "Got one more passenger for you," he tells the pilot and then waves for Ahsoka to join the clones — some more wounded than others — in the ship. Ahsoka turns as she steps in, unable to keep the teasing note out of her voice as she says,

"What, aren't you going to make sure I do as Master asks?"

Rex shakes his head, and were it not for his helmet, she's sure he'd be staring at her in a mixture of amusement and exasperation. "I'm sure you'll do what General Skywalker asked you to. Or he'll drag you to the medical bay himself if you don't."

Ahsoka winces. "I want to avoid that," she says, and then offers a small wave as a farewell before the door to the LAAT/i slides shut, metal floor rumbling as the engines ignite and carries them away from the dusty, nearly barren wasteland. It's hard to see that there was a battle just moments before, and Ahsoka closes her eyes, fingers tightening on the safety strap as a bone-deep weariness sweeps over her. It isn't just from this battle, she realizes, but from all of them, from this entire war that has gone on for far too long.

But the end is in sight at last, and she can hang on just a little bit longer.


End file.
